Have you ever run out of words to say when talking with someone? Maybe it’s someone you are starting to get to know, a colleague that you’re beginning a project with, or a friend you started hanging out with. You want to give a good impression, yet it seems there is a big gap. Building a deeper relationship with new people is like painting on a blank canvas. With just some tools and a concept in mind, you are able to paint with endless creativity. The RELATE acronym is a tool you can use to help you build deeper connections and relate with people more effectively. When someone feels the connection and is able to relate with you, the conversation can be endless!
RELATE
- R – Remember your Gospel story
Knowing your Gospel story will help you to understand God’s grace and faithfulness in your life and therefore encourage you to meet people where they are at. It can also be something you share openly with others as an encouragement to people who have never heard or might need a refresher of the Gospel.
- E – Educate yourself with various topics
Being well-versed on various topics can help to build up conversations. One way to grow in this is as simple as reading the news to know what is currently going on around the world. Reading up on different articles can also help you to be aware of things that may be related to different fields people are studying/working in.
- L – Listen actively for connecting points
While conversing, take time to listen, understand the person and look for similarities in personality, hobbies, experiences and values that you both have in common.
- A – Ask good open-ended questions
The last thing you want to do is to assume something about someone. Not only could this leave them feeling misunderstood, but it could also make them feel hurt. Ask good open-ended questions to allow the conversation to flow which could eventually lead to discussions with more connecting points. This way, both sides get to learn from each other.
- T – Talk to them from their perspective
Everyone appreciates having their perspectives heard and understood. Try to put yourself in their shoes and see their perspective. Accepting that there could be differences in opinions/values can actually make the conversation more interesting and fruitful.
- E – Empathize with their pain points
Everyone has their own story. Empathizing with people means putting yourself out there to understand and share their feelings, especially painful or difficult moments in their lives. It’s often said that we bond over failures more than successes. Leaving room for vulnerability and empathizing with them through it can speak volumes. For example, empathizing with someone who grew up in an environment without open communication will help them feel heard and known without judgment.
Ultimately, these tips can help us to share God’s love with those around us. The next time you meet someone new, try to RELATE with them!